Preppy Air...Commercial Flying Extraordinaire!

Preppy Air... where the look and the experience is in a class unto itself! (British Airways circa late 1980's-1990's uniform picture is from an amazing website: uniformfreak.com ...please check it out- lotsa' fun!)

Welcome to Preppy Air...we hope you enjoy your flight experience with us so please go ahead and relax those wing back chair seats to a comfortable reclining position, adjust your mini-library personal reading lamp and we'll have your drink order from the in-house bar brought to your seat as soon as possible. Thank you for flying today the Preppy-Way!

Ahhh, wouldn't that be truly wonderful? A commercial airline just for Preppies and those non-Preps wanting to be like us or just be hanging around with us?

I think today's world may indeed need a new airline such as this to come about...commercial travel unfortunately has declined in decorum and even now, it is possible to be in Business or First Class and sitting next to an alcohol-breathed, sweat-smelling, overly loud and uncouth individual decked out in his wife-beater-styled tank top, ratty jeans and tennis shoes that smell as rank as his breath. He must have missed his bus and decided to fly since the fares are now so-cheap and the new-normal is that almost anything-goes with proletariat passengers crowding ever-smaller rows of seats on the packed planes. Air travel has come to the masses and masses of people out there who have no idea how to dress themselves and address being within the general public in ways of just plain ole' politeness in all its actions and enactions. It's a shame really that our post modern world has devolved rather than evolved with the personal standards of everyday people out there within the public realm. The People of Walmart have taken to the air! (Have you ever seen that web site's pictures- it's so bad that I either cry from laughter or cry from dismay whenever I see what some real-folks actually do wear to Walmart) But I digress and need to get back to the more pleasant thoughts pertaining to Preppy Air.....and so...

Dress codes would apply to passengers where neat, presentable, appropriate length and coverage would be determined upon check-in. Any individuals who show up sporting tank tops only on-top, too-short or too-much-cleavage clothing items, bizarre' outfits in general will be refused boarding passes until they come back in decent, Preppy Air approved attire.

Conduct codes will also be enforced meaning no overtly weird-acting individuals, badly-behaving children, fighting families or much-too-drunk folks need even try to get on board one of Preppy Air's flights or hang around the gate areas. Preppy Air's airport attendants and security would be top notch and work quietly and quickly to rid the rest of us of such undesirable goings-on. It would be a privilege to fly Preppy Air, not a right and these two code-conditions stated outright in the ticket-purchasing process. Non-Preps are of course welcome to fly with Preppies however, a certain level of personal decorum is expected and enforced for all passengers 24/7 and 365 days a year- no exceptions.

Some aspects about Preppy Air would indeed be understood right off the bat such as:

The food would be plain fare, the non-alcoholic drinks basic standards but the bar offerings extensive and featuring many top-shelf brands. No Star-Chef menu offerings on Preppy Air just plain ole' fare much like one's own house-cook or one's Mother, when need be, would make and thus a typical dinner entree' for Adults: baked chicken breast over wild rice with a side of asparagus lightly lemoned and one hard roll; a typical entree' for Children: Campbell's' tomato or chicken noodle soup with a grilled cheese sandwich. In-flight snacks would be things like small bowls of assorted nuts, cheese and fruit plates and choices like the following: either Yankee-Preppy Cheese on Ritz crackers or Southern-Preppy Cheese Straws. However, food choice options to be kept at a minimal since Preppies eat whatever's put down in front of them and pay it no-attention.

Crew uniforms would be designed by the teaming-up of Brooks Brothers, Ralph Lauren and Kate Spade: navy blazers, khaki trousers and/or straight skirts at the knee, various brightly-hued button down shirts, quality cordovan plain leather belts and loafers- higher heeled loafer pumps an option for the female flight attendants, Ascot knotted scarves in plaids, stripes, paisleys, toiles' and for summer, a tropical-toned madras print. Hair and makeup styled in the classic tones of Grace Kelley and Cary Grant looks while jewelry kept to pearls, wedding rings and/or a family crest ring or school ring with the occasional gold charm bracelet or silver large monogrammed cuff bracelet for women and for men, just a family crest ring or school ring.

A special Lilly-Pulitzer styled aircraft line could be done for Preppies flying back n' forth to Palm Beach, Key West, the Bahamas and various Caribbean islands. Bright oranges with color-shots of hot pink and lime green along with bold, tropical florals and stripes would be that signature look for the planes and crew alike.

And the crew itself...pilots would all have their MBA's and childhood schooling in English Riding, flight attendants would know at least one other language than English preferably French plus have Art History degrees and a general knowledge pertaining to fine wines, sailing and be large dog fans but of course while gate and ticket agents would have a degree in Psychology and have memorized Emily Post's etiquette book during their job training.

And then the other features of Preppy Air which inculcate the ethos and vernacular of "Preppy":

The airplane exteriors for Preppy Air as well as its logo, print ads and such would be in navy blue with thin edging lines of gold and kelly green plus having a small-sized crest appropriately displayed with Garamond type-set lettering spelling out underneath it, "Preppy Air...Flying with Class: first class standards and experience are our daily standards and your flight experience."

Cabin interiors would be carpeted in Oriental or Berber rug runners; well-spaced rows of large elegant wing back chairs that convert to lay-flat beds upholstered in either subtle plaid, chintz or toile' fabrications and not matching but nicely coordinating; tray tables would be in mahogany wood; walls wallpapered in a cream on light buttery yellow striping; high ceilings and plenty of overhead storage for the Hartmann carry-ons and L.L.Bean canvas tote bags but of course.

Cabin bathrooms would be a bit larger in space than typical commercial airplane bathrooms and feature beadboard walls, porcelain farmhouse style sinks, mellow lighting and toiletry products by Caswell-Massey.

Magazine offerings would include such glossies as Town and Country, Sailing, Skiing, Traditional Home, Travel and Leisure, Kiplingers, W, The Robb Report, Coastal Living and so forth. No in-house magazine but Safety Brochures printed on Cranes cream stationary.

Overhead music would pipe-in relaxing classical and jazz upon boarding but have wake-up tunes on overnight flights' early morning arrivals featuring Preppy party favorites like the B-52's, etc. Soft, subtle lavender scents would be piped-into the cabin as the evening wanes on and then, early morning arrivals/departures would have brisk lemon scenting spritzed for a second.

Large dogs traveling with their owners would have their own cabin towards the rear of the plane featuring a "room" to roam within having comfortable sofas, dog beds, lots of dog toys, a personal water bowl and food bowl spot for each dog and a bathroom who's door automatically slides open when a dog approaches it. Flight attendants in this area would pamper said dogs and their owners be allowed to visit them as much as they wanted after take-off and before landing. Other animals like cats, birds and such would travel as all animals do on other airlines... small dogs may travel in dog-bag-handbags with their owners but are generally not encouraged on flights: Preppy flight attendants and passengers prefer them to be back with the rest of the non-Prep animals in baggage especially those pesky ones that yip in sharp, high-pitched barks.

And finally but just as important, all airport terminal waiting areas for Preppy Air would look like Father's club interior and have ticketing agents similar to club attendants and waiters: quiet, elegant and unobtrusive. Flights would be announced in moderate tones and moderate sound levels not from an overhead speaker but by an airline employee walking around and speaking to all assembled there plus offering to take drink orders pre-boarding and passing out glossy, Preppy-oriented magazines as well as The Wall Street Journal to those passengers desiring them. The full-experience of Preppy Air would be a class act from start to finish.

Ahhh.....an ever-galavanting-about-in-airplanes Preppy can dream can't she?

Maybe my husband and I should start up such an airline as this with James being a commercial pilot with an MBA and me having a business management background, fashion background and MA plus the two of us being Born-To Preppies, hmmm. It's something to think about.... start-up funding and trust funds have been wasted on ideas much worse, er, as fantastical as this.

Preppy Air! Preppies flying other Preppies around in a Preppy setting. Pretty Preppy-licious!!!